The Shepherd?

Encouraging words from a post by Sally Clarkson:

You are just exactly the right person, the one who God picked to shepherd these children in ways that no one else could. So live in that freedom today and enjoy your own unique family culture. This is the day the Lord has made–rejoice in the moments and be glad.

Oh, how I need to hear these words in seasons of doubt.

Erik and I decided that that we wanted to be the primary influence in our children's lives and as a result I decided to quit my job and stay home. How blessed we were to have the ability to do this but many days I see my own failures and depravity and wonder if the children may be better off under someone else's care.

I all too often try to conform their behavior and personality to one that meshes with mine: calm, controlled, organized, etc. They will never fit that mold because they were created to be them and not me. I get frustrated all too easily with the chaos, messes, fussing, and whining. I realize that my selfishness is at play here. I want things to go how I want them to go and in a way that is pleasing to me. Me? Selfish after all these years of following the Lord? Afraid so! Oh how He is using these children to illuminate my depravity and need of Him.

Are you sure Lord? Am I really the right person to shepherd these children? Yes, but only by your strength and power.

⁹ And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. ¹⁰ Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:9-11

So I choose to praise You that I am unsuited for motherhood, weak, selfish, unlovely, impatient, overwhelmed, and so much more. Use me however you will to reach the hearts of my children as you are really the only one who has access. Come Lord and be strong on my behalf and receive the glory that is yours alone!